Hi, friends! Today’s post is one that took me a long time to write. It will have a slightly different feel to most of my posts, and I kind of like that. I think it’s just as important for me to share with you that life can be hard as it is that life is fabulous and fun. Often we see how beautiful everyone’s lives look on social media. Rarely though, do we get a true look at the hard. I’m talking about the day-to-day hard.
I will say that I try my best to keep it real with you guys. On social media, instagram specifically, I often put my best foot forward. It is afterall my business, and I consider my instagram feed a work of art, a creative outlet, and my portfolio. I have really enjoyed using instagram stories to show you guys more of my day-to-day, real life moments though! You know…messy rooms, no make-up, toddler tantrums…real life stuff. But, what is rarely shown by me or other influencers are about are the tears, disagreements between spouses and friends, and normal hardships in life.
For some reason sharing the “big” hard things like post partum depression or getting a hysterectomy seem easier to share. Sharing that I had a bad day or bad week for whatever reason seems much more daunting. So in full disclosure, last week was a really hard week for me. In fact, I remember texting a friend on Friday saying I felt like the week had “kicked my A.” Even though my life may look pretty and fun on social media, it’s not always laughs and giggles. I’m a real person, too. 🙂
Anyway, stuff was going on in my personal life that made me feel down last week. At the same time I was feeling uninspired in my work life. Oh, and my kids were going stir crazy all week. It was rough. I typically consider myself a pretty tough cookie, but broke down and cried several times. I was in a funk. It was just one of those weeks that felt like it would never end. Can you relate?
It is okay to not be okay though. Over the past year, I have worked really hard on mindfulness. Specifically, I’ve worked on changing my mindset from negative to positive when I’m going through something tough. And not just changing my mindset over time, but in the moment when I seem to be spiraling downward. I have worked on accepting where I am, what I feel, and then making the conscious choice to pull myself out of it.
One of my new favorite authors, Glennon Doyle, talks a lot about learning to love yourself through the easy times and through trials. She often talks about the greatness of the process of trials. She talks of the beauty that comes from them. She speaks of treating trials as a self-discovery process; a growing opportunity. You cry, you allow yourself to feel all the feels, and then you shed. You shed and let go of what you don’t need and what needs to go before you move on. And finally, you experience a period of rebirth. This is where the growth happens; the beauty.
Anyway, the point of this post is not to give you an answer or solution to getting out of your trials or yuck. Rather, I just wanted to share that it is okay to not be okay. We all have those days, weeks, months, or years. I think the most important thing you can do is love yourself through your trials. Allow yourself to feel the yuck, to grieve your circumstance, and then take steps forward. You are in control of your thoughts. For me, I have to switch to an optimistic mindset. I’ve also found that listing things I have been blessed with or things I’m thankful for helps to pull me out of my funk. I also confide in friends. Sharing the burden is a real thing and a friend can not only do that, but hold you accountable to taking action steps.
All this to say, I want you to know that it is okay to not be okay. And it’s okay to share that. I actually think that if more of us shared the “real” moments in our lives, we would all be better for it. We’re all human, we’re all imperfect, and we all have our own set of trials. So, if you’re going through something tough right now, you’re not alone! We’re all in this world together – the good, the bad, and the tough!
photography: fort lion studio