6 easy tips to help you avoid gossiping

loft white wide leg pants

top: loft | pants: loft | wedges: target | bag: etienne aigner c/o | sunnies: karen walker

Hi, babes! I hope your week is off to a great start! Travis and I had the most wonderful weekend of doing nothing. Our girls stayed with my in-laws for the weekend, so Travis and I used our kidless time to run errands, tidy up around the house, and grill out. Oh, and of course we enjoyed some rose for National Rose Day Saturday. Our current favorite rose wines right now are the 2018 Fieldhouse Rose and the 2018 Gallivant Rose.

In an effort to be real with you guys, I will be expanding what topics I discuss here on Fleurdille. From motherhood topics to clean beauty, to my favorite wines, to topics like today – gossiping. I want to share with you guys more of what goes on in my head during the week and more of my actual life. I will still include affordable, everyday outfits of course, and you can always follow me on Instagram for my day-to-day looks.

Today I wanted to share with you all one of my biggest struggles – gossiping. This has been one of my biggest struggles for a long time. I do feel like I have it in check for the most part now, but let me tell you, it’s work. I’ve had to work at this for years and it’s still a conscious thought in my head when I’m chatting with other women. I’m a talker and an open book, so sometimes I seem to cross the line. Gossiping is so hurtful though and so unnecessary. It’s hurtful and doesn’t benefit anyone.

I’m not sure if you share this struggle, but just in case even one of you does, I thought I’d share with you some tips I use to avoid gossiping about others. They’ve been super helpful to me and hopefully they’ll help you, too!

6 tips to avoid gossiping:

  1. only talk about the people in the room – these first two tips I heard from one of the pastor’s at Watermark and they are great tips. This first tip is to only talk about people in the room. It’s an easy rule to remember and it removes any desire to talk about people that aren’t there.
  2. call the person you talked about – this tip is pretty powerful and will definitely nip your gossip habit in the bud. If you say anything – even something insignificant – about another person, call them after and tell them what you said about them.
  3. expose your weakness – this has helped me a lot and helped a lot several years ago when I really started trying to stop all gossip. I would simply start my conversations with other women by saying that I struggle with gossiping and to please stop me or call me out if I started to gossip in any way.
  4. would you say it in front of the person test – this is a great litmus test. Before you say anything, ask yourself if you would say it in front of the person you’re discussing. Sometimes it’s okay to talk about another person if it’s something like “I love what so-and-so was wearing last night” or something to that nature. You would definitely say that in their presence. But, if you wouldn’t say it to the person themselves, don’t say it.
  5. stay positive – this is so helpful! If you’re feeling inclined to gossip, only allow yourself to say positive things about that person. If you can’t think of something positive, then abide by the old adage: “if you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”
  6. go directly to the person – if you have something to say about a person or if something is bothering you, go directly to the person. Talking about it with others does not solve the problem or help the situation. Go directly to the person.

loft white wide leg pants

outfit details:

Comfy/casual is for sure my jam, especially in the summer! These wide leg pants are so cute and I’ve honestly gotten so much wear out of them. They are a great alternative to white jeans and can easily be worn in the office, too! I went for an all-white summer look today and paired it with this lace camisole. LOFT makes some of my favorite camisoles if I’m being honest. They’re all well-lined, hold up in the wash, and have a touch of femininity.

The little bag in today’s post is also one of my new favorites. It’s a bit more than I typically spend on a clutch, however, it can be worn all year long. It’s a perfect neutral color that will work in every season. It also comes with a strap to make it a crossbody, so you can get two looks out of it. If you’re wondering how big it is, it’s just perfect! I can fit my 8 plus phone in it along with my keys, some lip gloss, and my wallet.

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top: loft | pants: loft | wedges: target | bag: etienne aigner c/o | sunnies: karen walker

photography: maribel morales